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Okay, first things first: No, I am not dead. Not yet.


I might have suffered of something called ''Unbridled All-consuming Bone-deep Exhaustion''. Meaning I was tired. In a very mean way. In a way where my brain was managing to function on a basic level, and I could just push myself to get my work done, but where the free spirit of creativity is depressingly absent.


So I have had the next chapter of ''Shadow of a Doubt'' almost done for a few week but didn't stand a chance of finishing. I was truly stuck. I'm on it again, and I hope to get it to you soon. The new chapter for ''The Heart's Desire'' will take a little longer – sorry for that.


I am truly happy for all your enthusiasm for both of my stories, and I feel bad for you having to wait this long, but sometimes life just gets in the way of things. As a little consolation there is a little Sneak Peek for 'Shadow of a Doubt''...



Read more... )
zairaa: (Default)
I just wanted to let you know that the new chapter of  The Heart's Desire  is half done. Meaning I have crossed the 5.000 words mark. I read it to my husband tonight and he asked me why I won't post it as it is. The answer is simple. I'm afraid you would lynch me, or at least throw some imaginary rotten eggs my way if I left it at that. 

At the end of next week I will go for a one week holiday at my refuge at the northern sea. I hope to finish it before that. But it is a very important chapter, and I want to do it right. So please be patient with me.

x Zaira
zairaa: (Default)

Hello dear wonderful readers!


This is a shout out to everybody who is waiting for Sirius finally getting back in the court room and – hopefully – the Wizengamot pulling out the stick from their *** and leting  him go. Those of you who are following my story The Heart's Desire for a while already, have gotten used to rather regular and quick updates.

So, you ask, why is Zaira slacking now? Has she written herself in a corner?

No. Don't worry. Actually the next chapter is one of those where I actually do know with a lot of certainty what's going to happen. But my writing time has been brutally diminished in the last two weeks. And I'm not talking about that time where I'm sitting down on my couch or at my kitchen table relaxed and just a little bit giddy with a glass of wine / cup of coffee / box of chocolate. I'm talking that half hour on a train commute or that sleepy hour at midnight before I crawl into bed. I've been meeting myself coming back lately, and the Muse got bored and wandered off sulking, since I'm just no fun. :-/


I hope for things to get slowly better during the next week. So, I'm sorry for keeping you waiting! Just know that it's honestly not me sadistically cackling while enjoying your frustration and suffering.


To show you that I'm indeed still alive and working on it when ever I can, for those of you who are curious, a tiny little sneak peek:


Be aware that until the chapter is finished, things can still be changing.

Read more... )
zairaa: (Default)

Hello dear friends,


I know quite a few of you are waiting impatiently for updates by now. And I can tell you that there probably will be a new chapter for 'The Heart's Desire' within the next week. For 'Shadow of a Doubt' I have to do some more plotting, and I can't really concentrate on it right now while trying to handle the chapter of THD. All will come in due time.


But please remember, I do have a real job besides writing fanfiction. A job that often keeps me working ten hours straight without a lunch break, and that needs a lot of brainpower, energy and sometimes emotional endurance. I don't want my writing to become work that needs to be done, it will only lose by that. And I have enough actual deadlines to meet as a lawyer, where people's jobs, financial support or personal safety is at stake. I don't want to put up deadlines for my writing.


I spend a LOT of my free time dedicated to my writing. I take my laptop everywhere, much to the amusement and sometimes annoyance of my friends and family. I write on trains and busses and in cars, I write at airports, I write at night while my husband is sleeping next to me. But writing takes time and balance and inspiration. Sometimes you write two pages in an hour, and sometimes a single paragraph will take all evening. But I write because I love it and enjoy it. And I love it when you enjoy it. But for that you need to be a little bit patient, and if you are, I promise you I won't let you down! : )

zairaa: (Default)

Unposted scene:  During a Leglimency session Snape sees his worst memory inside Sirius' head.

This shows my theory that memories, whether watched in a pensieve or read through Leglimency can never be taken as absolute truth. They are the production of our minds, and therefore subjective. We also tend to add stuff that we assume but did not actually have seen or heard.

It really was an experiment, but definitely too long and unrelated to the story in general tomake it into my story ''The Heart's Desire''.

Read more... )


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September 2015

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